Hey there..you may be bored reading the same old bin column from a few years back..but honest..one of these days I am going to put up all my great crazy record review columns if I can get at an email or two demanding that I post them here..are you interested? Lemme Know -Z 2007

Title: “Batman”
Label: Design Records
Purchased from : Goodwill (Akron, Ohio)
Price: .60
Artist: The Batboys
Year of Release : 1968?
Writer: Michael Devine

The Scene of the Crime: A middle-class suburban home in the summer of 1968. It’s a sunny Saturday afternoon and Mom and Dad return from the local Kroger’s with the weekly supply of foodstuffs.

Mom: Well, young man , we found you a very special surprise at the grocery store.
Unsuspecting Lad: Gee, Mom, what is it? Huh? What is it?
Dad: It’s that “Batman” record you have been bugging us about all month. Now, don’t play it too loud.
Mom: (Pulling the album out of large brown bag)
Here you go, you little scalawag!
Salivating Youngster: Wow! Cool! Thanks! ...Hey, that’s funny, it doesn’t look like the Batman record I saw in the music store!

Dad: Aw, Batman, Schmatman! They’re all the same.

The confused youth trots his new album to his room, rips
open the plastic wrap and looks at the label.

Stupefied Youngin’: Man, I never heard of these songs:
“Mighty Mayhem”, “Cheatin’ Charlie”, “The Uppercut Blues”?
Oh well, here’s the Batman theme, I’ll play that one first.
Echh! ...this doesn’t sound anything like the one on TV. Where’s the guitar? Where’s the singers going “Nah-Nah Nah-Nah Nah-Nah Nah-Nah”? It’s just some guys and a roller rink organ! P.U.! Gee...Every song on here stinks!

The Batman record by The Batboys, is then placed in the “special box” under his bed with his old kiddie records.
It is then taken to the Goodwill some 30+ years later, priced at 60 cents where it awaited the next chump.

Title: “Jan and Dean Meet Batman”
Label: Liberty Records
Purchased from: Gift from Gerry Tonti
Price: I had to play it on the radio
Artist: Jan and Dean
Year of Release : 1966
Writer: Michael Devine
After ingesting this feeble attempt, I cannot determine if this is “pre-accident” Jan and Dean. This is clearly a case of bad ideas surrounded by yes men and a huge budget. The concept of the album is that Jan and Dean are transformed into a fun-loving, yet inept duo of superheroes by their studio engineer when he accidentally crossed wires on the recording console during “The Little Old Lady from Pasadena”. The little old lady appears and calls on the newly christened “Captain Jan and Dean, the Boy Blunder” for help. She explains that she will contact them via a chocolate chip cookie signal reciever.
I would like to cease reviewing the storyline of this “Batman” inspired concept album to state that it becomes even more juvenile and less entertaining. It’s roams in that area between absurd and embarrassing. The perfect example is that first few seconds of consciousness after a deep REM sleep. You are disoriented and your brain is trying to sift through a network of information and scenarios that made perfect sense only moments ago. This album captures that comatose muddle.
In an effort to make things less deranged, studio engineers edited in tiny bits of real songs and an avalanche of sound effects. The graphics department was handed a large budget to produce the slick color glossy cover. Licensing was cleared to fully unite ABC-TV’s “Batman” TV show and Liberty records. In fact, the back cover is nothing more than a overtly detailed history of “Batman” and a plug for the television show. They pop in the Neal Hefti, “Batman Theme” to try to appease the audience.
But, unlike Batman, all these “do-gooders” cannot save the day. The album is the nadir of Batman knock-offs.
“Holy-Convoluted-Horseshit-Batman!”